My Poetry
ConfessionI've always kept things to myself, Sharing only what I chose, And to express my thoughts and feelings, Relied on lyrics and prose. There's a part of me hidden deep inside That I keep private, just for me. A small locked area in my soul I can't let anyone see. You might think you've broken down a wall, But I've replaced it with ten more. For every window you climb through, There's always an iron door. While you're reading this journal, Keep this thought in mind. For every story and poem within, Hides a memory behind. This journal is like a master key To that safeguarded place inside. That room that I've always kept secret, The place that my soul will hide. I offer you these insights, The memories yet to see, With only one confession. This is the real me. |
JadedShe seems to you an angel, Gentle, pure and kind. Though you seek to break the illusen, Any fault you cannot find. She guides you through your misery, You protect her for loves sake. She holds you closer with every day, Your heart is hers to take. You relied upon your heart, You should have listened to your mind. For every halo and pair of wings, Shines a demons light behind. |
Broken HeartI'd heard the expression, Of a world being torn apart. I never knew what it meant, To have a broken heart. Not that long ago, Our love drifted away. My dreams were always empty, The pain had the final say. When I thought I had a chance, To be by your side, The memories came flooding in, The love I couldn't hide. You didn't need me anymore, You said the trust had died. I told you I wasn't hurting, Even though you knew I'd lied. Now I know it was love, I felt for you from the start. The pain I'm suffering now, Comes of a broken heart. |
The BridgeBuilt with care and sacrifice, A bridge appears, Holding up the strength, And shadowing our fears. A symbol of friendship, It's high for all to see, Showing admirers from below, The quiet powers that be. If our bridge should fall, And crash into the sand, The confidence and honesty, Will fall out of our hands. The earth below our swinging bridge, Holds nothing to the heart, And when and if our bridge should break, Our friendship falls apart. |
ReflectionsShe stands still before me, Eyes clouded in pain. A single tear falls And the shadows remain. Looking lost in confusion And drowning in loss, She suffers the past And the future it cost. She cries for the moment, That last wave of the tide Where childhood magic And reality collide. The time when the innocence Gives way to harsh light And rose colored glasses Take on a new sight. My heart aches to see her So sullen and weak. I scarcely notice The tear on my cheek. I reach out to touch her With nothing to say, But she reaches out To keep me away. A new tear leaves its mark And others come fast. Realization dawns When our hands touch the glass. |
RediscoveryAlone in the universe, A sky vast with stars. Painfully recalling long ago scars. Wounds that run deep, A river of tears. Carefully disguising these old, ancient fears. Scream in the shadows, Cry in the rain. Grasping for peace that I cannot sustain. The sunshine eludes me, And darkness lives on. Living the past that should be long gone. A voice deep inside, Crying out from my soul. Mending the pieces of a heart that was whole. New light guides the way, The darkness lets go. Yet the path is painful and the process is slow. For each moment in time, That tortures the day A new star comes forward and highlights the way. As one spark starts a fire, One star lights the sky, And the past fades away to a silent goodbye. |
UntitledHe waits in the shadows, He stands in the rain. His smile widens as He feels my pain. An ice cold touch Upon my face. A single tear falls, Yet leaves no trace. I run for safety, He's right behind. There is no refuge That he can't find. The fear overtakes me, I cannot see. I walk towards him, Death waits for me. |
Through a Childs EyesThrough a childs eyes, it's all a game. The news, the cartoons, they're one and the same. A war claims lives, A child dies, It's only pretend through a childs eyes. Through a childs eyes, it's all for play. The needles, the barbies, how different are they? Drugs or toys, Little difference in size, It isn't reality through a childs eyes. Through a childs eyes, life never ends. Cancer and aids, their road never bends. A neverending path, For all of their lives, It all lasts forever through a childs eyes. Through a childs eyes, the world is brand new. The sunlight, the stars, the fresh morning dew. Each day with it brings, A welcome surprise, Everything is beautiful through a childs eyes. |
For JoshuaAll of my life, I've had something to say. A clever reply, words in the way. Yet tonight as I watch you soundly sleep, There aren't the words to explain. A love that swells with just one smile. A single touch makes life worthwhile. If only I had the words to describe, What loving you is to me. It's brand new days and endless nights, All my dreams right in my sights. It lifts me higher than the furthest star, And I feel like I could fly. When I hold you close, I barely understand, Why tears of pride are close at hand. No matter how closely I hold you to me, You can never be close enough. For a person who relies on the spoken word, Not what can be seen, but what can be heard, It's impossible to explain a feeling, That can't be described in words. You're my link to the future, My reward for the past, My reason for living when life moves too fast. There just aren't the words to impart, You're my most cherished work of art. |
Goal of LifeIn my life, I've seen battles won, Mountains crumble, miracles done. I've watched nations cry and stories unfold, Rumors whispered and secrets told, And all the while, I hope and pray, For safety in my life. In my life, I've seen flowers bloom, Breathless sunsets and a midnight moon. I've watched snowflakes fall and autumn leaves, New spring petals and summers eve's, And all the while, I hope and pray, For beauty in my life. In my life, I've seen fortunes won, Children weeping when the day is done. Empty tables and bills piled high, While others strive to touch the sky, And all the while, I hope and pray, For success in my life. In my life, I've seen romance start, Cupids aim at a waiting heart. I've watched lovers quarrel and teardrops flow, Angels crying for what we can't know, And all the while, I hope and pray, For love in my life. In my life, I've seen children smile, Eyes that sparkle, and all the while, My most sacred hope and deepest prayer, Was the foundation of my soul. I was blessed with happiness, I have reached the hardest goal. |
Perfect & ProudSwift and silent, Racing through the night. Thrill of the pace, in his freedom, delight. Daring and deadly, Keeping pace with his pack. Howling a warning of his future attack. Loyal and lethal, Softly stalking his prey. Bathing in moonlight and awaiting the day. Perfect and proud, His children stay in back. The wolf standing strong at the head of his pack. |
My Saving GraceLate at night when I'm alone And the darkness closes tight, When solitude is all around me, Music brings in light. When storm clouds gather, rain pours down And lightening makes the sky glow. When rain washes over me, tearing my eyes, Music is the rainbow. The heartache dulls my senses And my river of tears runs vast. When the pain is tearing me apart, Music drives it to the past. When my soul swells with heartfelt joy And happiness rules the day, We sing to joy and dance with grace, And music leads the way. |
Private RealityColors brightened, words are clearer, Sounds are louder, faces nearer. I lift my head and see the stars, A memory of long ago scars. New pain tends to cover old tears. My eyes won't reveal the truth of my fears. I shy away from questions now. Long from this time, will they remember how, I used to drift off to a world of my own where Colors brightened, words are clearer, Sounds are louder, faces nearer. |
TornIn my heart a story resides, Yet inside my soul divides. Toward light and laughter, I know my future lays. The other half drifts to lonelier days. Memories of past, Pains of long ago, Run through my mind, painfully slow. I live each day over, When I close my eyes Wet tears on my face, Each morning I rise. The days may be gone, Long dead and past, Yet the rest of my days, Those heartaches will last. My future is brighter, My vision is clear. My past I bury deep, And hold new days dear. In my heart a story resides, Yet inside my soul divides. |
Until The DayI used to be lost, My skies were all dark. I used to be lonely, My world torn apart. I'd locked up my soul, And put away my heart, Until the day I met you. I've cried on your shoulder, I've died for your kiss. Who ever knew that love, Could be like this? My skies now are blue, And a wild, hazy mist, Reminds me of the day I met you. My life is so different, A new bridge I have crossed. I gave you the key, To the heart I had lost. Your bright, shining eyes, Warmed my smile and melted frost, All since the day I met you. |
The Witches Keeper - Her StoryHer stormy eyes upon you, You start to turn away. She beckons you beside her, Softly you hear her say, "I am the wind that blows at night, I am the fires that burn. All eternity is in my sight, The secrets, mine to learn. Come, be my captor, fill my soul, Stand by me forever, And we shall hold the darkness close, And capture time together." |
The Witches Keeper - His StoryHe stands solemn by her side, His rage hidden from your view, And guards his keep with jealous pride, His prize only to pursue. You seek to be close to her, You start to move her way. Then his power invades your mind, Without words, you hear him say, "No other man may know her, She is mine alone to cage, And those who defy my power, Will suffer at my rage." |
SomethingSomething in the way you look at me, The way your eyes sparkle in the light. Tells me to put my fears aside, Tells me everything will be alright. Something in the way you talk to me, Especially the way you say my name. Convinces me I'm not imagining this, That you really feel the same. Something in the way you hold me, When I'm curled up in your arms. It feels like nothing could hurt me, Forever safe from harm. Something in the way you touch me, The way your hands feel on my face, Tells me I don't have to wander anymore, Shows me that I've finally found my place. Something in the way you say that line, Three simple words that stole my soul. Makes me feel alive inside, Empty pieces now made whole. |
SomewhereSomewhere there's someone just like me, Drifting and dreaming of what might be. Somewhere he sits, alone with his past, Begging to know why true loves never last. Maybe he wishes he could go back in time, Head full of regrets, like I have in mine. Maybe he thinks about things he's done wrong, Wants to go back, but knows that time is gone. Maybe he thinks about times he should forget, Painful memories that haven't healed yet. Wondering why he didn't see through the lies, Was seeing with his heart instead of his eyes. Maybe he swears to himself silently, That never again will he trust so freely. Maybe he throws up those walls made of steel, Protecting his heart, but it doesn't seem real. Maybe he sits alone in the night, Wanting that love, but sees no hope in sight. Hiding his soul and sheltering his heart, Vowing to never let it be torn apart. What does he see when he looks at his face? An empty shell who can't find his place? If he only knew that I'm sitting right here, With just as much heartache, and twice as much fear. He feels so alone, like I feel so jaded, Letting my heart and my soul be invaded. Allowing myself to be put through that pain, Just to get past it, and go through it again. Somewhere there's someone just like me, Drifting and dreaming of what might be. Somewhere he sits, knowing he's not alone, Like the girl sitting here at the end of this poem. |
In His DreamsI sit here and watch him sleep, His thoughts and dreams all his to keep. But I have to wonder whats taking place To keep that little smile on his face. Does he dream of sunshine and clear blue skies? Is that what he sees with those childlike eyes? Does he dream of rainbows or stars shining bright, Twinkling softly all throught the night? Does he dream of music, songs to sing? Or dream about what the next day will bring? Does he dream about tickles and laughing so loud, Never knowing I'm standing behind him, so proud? Does he dream about kisses and hugs so tight, Those hugs where he holds with all of his might? Does he dream of me loving him more every day, Loving him more than I ever could say? v I'll never know, I can only pretend, While I watch his eyes flutter as this dream comes to an end. Whatever his dreams, I just hope he knows, That every minute of the day, my love for him grows. Just when I think I couldn't love him more, He does something else and I feel my heart soar. And as his next dream leads him far from this place, I smile as I see that little grin on his face. |
LoveLife is defined by many choices, Decisions made by silent voices. Walls built of guilt, heartache and tears, There to defend from the worst of my fears. So much time wasted alone in the night, Pretending to live but no strength left to fight. About to lose hope, nothing else left to do. That was the day I found you. Sweet thoughts and words that I needed to hear, Safe in your arms, not one thought of fear. When I wake up, your face is the first thing I see, I didn't have the choice, my heart made it for me. One kiss from you and the world melts away, Missing you more with every minute of the day. Forgetting the past now that you're in my heart, Dream of the day when we won't be apart. |
RegretsIn your darkest hour, you sit alone Trying desperately to atone For mistakes you've made and can't undo, Living those memories each day through. So many mistakes, all the wrong choices, Hearing a chorus of condemning voices, How could I do that, how could I be so blind? Wanting to change it, but life has no rewind. Crying tears of regret, confusion and pain, For the pain in your heart that you just can't contain. You look in the mirror only to see, That the person before you has no sympathy. Mistakes are made, it's how we learn, Make the wrong choices, take the wrong turn. We start out on a path with no map at all, Sometimes you'll stumble, you may even fall. Though you continue to walk, you carry the pain, Living through the mistakes and the heartache again. Memories haunt you with each day that goes by, You can't let it go, and you don't understand why. When we look in the mirror, our conscience looks out, We're face to face with our regrets and our doubt. Shame in yourself has you living in lies, Can't face your reflection, no pride in your eyes. In your darkest hour, you sit alone Trying desperately to atone For mistakes you've made and can't undo, But the one you need to forgive is you. |
Why We Don't BelieveGod said "don't kill" And looks down in shame, But what he meant was, Only kill in his name. For He has killed thousands, For reasons absurd, And commanded his prophets To kill on his word. He commanded Moses, with the help of his men, To slaughter the Midianites, and steal what you can. They murdered the men, and kings one through five, Only the women and children left alive. But when Moses returned, he wasn't impressed, And tore a strip off his soldiers for not killing the rest. His God had ordered them all to be killed, And on His command, their blood should be spilled. But as he's a kind God, a compassionate Lord, He gave them the virgins to rape as reward. If the Christian in you doubts this act was done, Look for yourself, check Numbers 31. In Samual 12, he condones rape again, But this time delivers the victims to men. And you'll see that his support of rape had only begun, When you read about the sex slaves in Exodus 21. The God that you worship, and claim is a love, Shining down from a heavenly, holy place above, Sanctified slavery, and rape, and murder and more. Yet you persistently claim it's him you adore? Is your fear of the unknown so great that you must, In a war-mongering murderer place your trust? If this is the God that you say is your savior, What does that really say about your behavior? I believe in compassion, in kindness and love, And not because some spirit from miles above Threatens me with torture and suffering in hell, If I don't fall prey to the christian spell. It's do as I say, not as I do, Unless you're the one I give my command to. Then break all commandments, walk a hypocrites path Or else you'll be the next to suffer my wrath. With a leader like that, Father of Adam and Eve, Is it any wonder so many Choose not to believe? |
Shattered Curiousity"Why do we go to church Mom?" Said the girl with hair of gold. "To talk to God and say our prayers", Is what the girl was told. "But can't we pray to him from here?" Was her curious reply. "Church is where God lives dear" Said her mother with a sigh. The little girl said thoughfully, "I thought he lived in heaven. Remember Mommy, you told me that, When I was only seven." Her mother, with a frustrated smile, Replied "Of course he does, But the church is his home on earth, Where he comes to listen to us" "But Mommy, I don't understand, Even though I really try, If God is listening to me, Why doesn't he reply?" "You don't hear him with you ears, dear, You hear him with your heart. You only have to listen better", The mother did impart. "And what if I can't hear him?" Said the girl with eyes of blue, And the exasperated mother said, "I don't know dear, we just do". v And so begins the cycle, Of believing what we're told, What once was curiousity, Is now marching in the fold. |
Give Me One ReasonGive me one reason why I should try To think about you without the urge to cry. I haven't begun to forget the pain, Why would I want to relive it again? Give me one reason why we have to meet, When I still can't forget all the pain and deceit. The scars are still open, tears just barely dried, My trust for you stolen, all begun when you lied. Give me one reason why your thoughts are of me. Is it because of love lost, or are you just lonely? I wasn't in your thoughts when you broke my heart, Filled your world with lies and tore my world apart. Give me one reason that I should forget And put aside hurt that hasn't healed yet. You tell me that some fences are meant to be mended, I say you shouldn't forget why it ended. |
CrashWalking my own path, eyes cast to the ground, Barely aware of other people around. You don't see the impact your presense has made, On another who crashed through the path you parade. Like a ripple spreads out when a pebble is thrown, Your actions affect those who walk on their own. Each crash we endure while we wander our lives, Causes more lives to be touched, and the next ripple thrives. A man walks with misery, pain deep in his soul, Feels his life has no meaning, never feels whole, Then he crashes with someone who's pain is whole hearted, In helping one, the others new life has started. A girl walks with anger, bitter rage haunts her nights, She releases the hurt with the poetry she writes. Another who reads them finds she's not alone, For someone else feels the same anger she's known. The comfort of knowing someone else feels her pain, Allows her to let go and start living again, The crash brought her peace, and she offers hope, To those she crashes into, helps them to cope. A young boy in trouble, drugs steal his youth, His childhoods a haze, can't tell fiction from truth. During his walk, his path crosses with death, Watches his best friend take his last breath. The crash with disaster leaves him broken in shock, And he changes the course of the path he will walk. Teaches kids of the dangers, helps drug addicts fight, One crash touches many, no matter how slight. The ripples expand, always drawing more in, And each life affected makes a new path begin, For each movement you make, and each smile you share, Can end someones heartache, pain and despair. No matter how deep the river that you've had to wade, Someone has noticed the strength you've displayed. Each time you cried, someone counted your tears, And used them to conquer their own silent fears. You walk without knowing that each crash is defined, By the number of lives that become intertwined. |
RewindHave you ever wondered what you could do If you could go back and live another day through? The regrets and the guilt we build up, all combined, Can make you wish life was equipped with rewind. Went back a year, when the heartbreak was new, Suffering in silence was all I could do. But removing that time would take with it the good, So I wasn't entirely sure that I should. The ending was painful, and left me near broken, Especially with much left unfinished and unspoken, But the strength that I found, and confidence I gained, Made the battle worth fighting, so that memory remained. v Travel back further, a few years before, To a time when my daughter stood outside deaths door, Fear I couldn't imagine had ever existed, Had me frantic, my thoughts all broken and twisted. I hate to remember it, I could take it away, Except then I wonder how it affects me today, I love them more knowing how fast the time goes, So that memory remains, and my love for them grows. Go back even further, to when I was sixteen, Neither adult nor child, stuck somewhere in between. Wanting so badly to be free, on my own, Rushed into a world that I'd never known. The mistakes that I made don't even compare, To the lessons and pride I earned while I was there. I'd erase the whole person, the writer behind, The poem you're now reading, if I hit rewind. But the reason I write this is not wisdom of ages, Not considering the rewards of life's stages, One selfish thought made me see this poem through, If I'd hit rewind, I wouldn't have found you. |
Forget MeBefore you turn and walk away, There's something that I'd like to say. It won't be what you want to hear, But there's something I want to make very clear. Forget me, erase me from your mind. When you turn away, leave all that behind. Don't think about the way you cared, Or the talks we had and dreams we shared. Forget me, don't remember my face, Clear me from your thoughts and leave no trace. Don't remember my smile or how my eyes would shine, When I knew that you were only mine. Forget me, pretend "us" never existed, Honest feelings that ended up broken and twisted. Don't wonder if there's something else you could do, Because after you leave, I won't think about you. |
My Bedtime PrayerNow I lay me down to sleep, No God to pray my soul to keep, And if I die before I wake, There'd be no soul for him to take. I don't believe in the eternal soul, And don't need that belief just to feel whole. God is to me what Santa is to you, An interesting story, but not at all true. I didn't learn ethics from a fictional story, And I don't behave just to be with God and his glory. My morals rely on common sense and compassion. Respect right and wrong, in the practical fashion. When a believer has problems, they seek Him in prayer, But when I looked for Him, I found nothing there. So I don't ask God's help when my hearts filled with dread, I search for solutions to the problem instead. And someday I'll die, no avoiding that fate, But I know at the end there'll be no pearly gate. I've never felt comforted by the concept they sell, That life is just an entrance to heaven or hell. I don't spent time worrying about what happens after. I focus on life! On living and laughter! Eternal life lies in the hearts of my children, Not in the idea of acceptance to heaven. So now I lay me down to sleep, Their smiling faces in my memory to keep, And if I die before I wake, I lived for me, not for God's sake. |